Chapter Eighteen: If All Fails

If you were to fail, how would life be for you?

Writing our goals is a well-known strategy to plan effectively for success. Yet, many of us overlook the importance of embracing failure as a stepping stone to achieving our goals. The concept of a failure statement might initially surprise you, but it serves a crucial purpose in our journey towards success.

Failure statements, often perceived negatively, can actually be powerful tools for growth and development. One significant benefit of a failure statement is that it promotes a growth mindset. By admitting and analyzing failures, individuals can identify areas for improvement and develop strategies to overcome similar challenges in the future. This approach shifts the focus from personal shortcomings to opportunities for growth, encouraging a proactive attitude towards learning and development. It helps build resilience and adaptability, essential traits in today's rapidly changing world.

Moreover, failure statements enhance transparency and trust. When we openly discuss failures, it creates an environment where everyone feels safe to take risks and innovate. This openness can lead to more effective problem-solving and collaborative efforts, as individuals are not afraid to share their ideas and learn from their mistakes.

There was a point in my life when I was struggling mentally and financially. I had many moments when I couldn't get over the heavy feeling of sadness and lack of motivation. Imagine running a marathon and dragging a heavy load, but hoping that you will reach your destination if you just keep pushing through. It gets exhausting when that feeling lingers on every day. This resulted in my thoughts consistently overpowering me at night and I would cry myself to sleep. Even in the midst of these emotions, the idea of ending my life never once occurred to me. I was fully aware that all of this was temporary, and I remained confident that I just needed to discover a way out. So, I took time to re-motivate myself and writing a failure statement crossed my mind. I had to imagine my life if I were to give up on my hopes and dreams.

Is this what I want my life to be?

Here is my Failure Statement written back in March 2021:

Will you remember me?

This is the last picture I took of myself.

There are a lot of things I haven't been honest about.

I have been in denial for so long and I think I'm starting to accept what is.

This is the secret life I haven't told anyone because I am afraid and ashamed.

What would the world think of me?

How much can I accept before I reach my breaking point?

You know...

I used to be happy.

I used to have the biggest smile on my face.

I used to believe that true love exist.

I used to think that I was inspiring.

I used to think that I was invincible.

I used to hear my sons say I am the best mother.

I used to travel the world.

I used to wake up in a warm bed with my sons next to me.

I used to eat what I want when I want.

But as of today:

I am homeless.

I gave up my brand new car because I couldn't afford it anymore.

I lost custody of my two boys and I don't know where they are now.

I have -$329.76 in my bank account.

I am in $200,000 of debt.

I left a extremely abusive and toxic relationship.

I have been doing illegal things that I shouldn't have gotten myself into.

I have started using drugs because it numbs the pain inside.

I found out that I have lung cancer after 13 years of smoking.

I also found out that I have depression. That explains all the suicidal thoughts in my head.

I starve most days and get lucky if I get enough change for a piece of candy.

I have nothing left.

Sometimes I wonder...

Will anyone remember who I was before all of this?

Will anyone remember me at all?

They say people often remember the bad better than the good so I guess not?

But you know what?

If you've gotten this far, thank you for taking the time to read my Failure Statement. A Failure statement is like a goal statement but instead you write how it'll feel if you failed yourself. So in reality, I'm okay!

This consists of all my fears and the phases I never wish to go through. It was hard to write this because it made me feel the pain of being at my lowest. I know failures are what mold us to become who we are but sometimes we aren't prepared for the worst. Because we are taught to dream and achieve the perfect life. We expect to reach the destination with rainbows, unicorns and sunshine. Little do we know, life happens unexpectedly.

This is not intended to offend anyone but I hope it inspires you to write your own Failure statement. It is a good reminder that every day may not be your best day. Life happens. Heartbreak happens. Loss happens. Weakness happens. It's okay to be vulnerable.

But. You. Keep. Going.

I am a daughter, sister, mother, auntie, and a friend to someone.

This is my reminder to myself that a bad day is not a bad life. I didn't come this far to get this far only.

I'll be just fine and you will too.

You got this.

Now, I urge you to write a failure statement to serve as a powerful reminder of the emotions failure can evoke. Embrace those feelings and let your failures propel you forward, rather than hold you back.

Thank you for reading this chapter. I hope you enjoyed the read and you or someone you know can relate. Please leave any respectful feedback. Have a blessed day!

Xoxo,